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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26468569">Flirting 101</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heroine_Lestrange/pseuds/Heroine_Lestrange'>Heroine_Lestrange</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>5+1 Things, Crack, F/F, Fluff, Humor</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 08:47:42</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,583</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26468569</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heroine_Lestrange/pseuds/Heroine_Lestrange</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>5 times Alex flirts with the wrong BAU member and the one time she doesn't.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alex Blake/Jennifer "JJ" Jareau</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Emily</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Alex Blake was dead on her feet, after working day and night for days on end in order to catch a spree killer she was ready for a weekend of sleep. That luxury however would not be afforded to the team until the paperwork was neatly completed and filed away, much to all of their disdain. So the only option the linguistic specialist had was to fill up on caffeine and hope to keep her eyes open long enough to complete her report.</p>
<p>“Blake, you look the way I feel,” Emily said, handing over a mug to the older brunette as she approached the coffee machine.</p>
<p>“Trust me Prentiss, you definitely look how you feel,” Alex retorted with a wry grin resulting in a chuckle from the other woman.</p>
<p>“I’m wounded, I bet you wouldn't say something like that to JJ,” Emily retorted.</p>
<p>“Of course not, she looks perfect no matter the situation,” Alex offered with a slight shrug.</p>
<p>“You’re not subtle at all Alex,” Emily replied.</p>
<p>“I have no idea what you're talking about.”</p>
<p>“I’m a profiler.”</p>
<p>“Mmm, that's news to me,” Alex snorted, sipping her coffee while watching Emily.</p>
<p>“Well I bet if you play your cards right, you could get a certain blonde agent to help tuck you in tonight,” Emily smirked, raising her eyebrows suggestively.</p>
<p>“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Alex feigned ignorance, knowing that Emily would see right through her. “Maybe I’m interested in a certain brunette agent tucking me in instead.”</p>
<p>“Oh really, now whoever could you mean by that? Reid? Morgan? Ooh….Hotch?” Emily asked, lowering her voice seductively.</p>
<p>“Oh I think you know exactly who I mean. Tall, dark, mysterious,” Alex replied moving closer to the other woman, stopping just before there faces made contact.</p>
<p>“Annoying,” Alex whispered. Before she could elaborate further a loud cough from the kitchen doorway caused the two to swiftly move apart. Looking toward the source of the sound they both spotted a blushing JJ looking unsure.</p>
<p>“Hey JJ, can I get you some coffee?” Emily asked, readying another cup for the blonde as she nodded in reply.</p>
<p>“I should get back to my files,” Alex said, giving the women a small smile before leaving the room.</p>
<p>“So…..,” JJ started.</p>
<p>“So…..” Emily mimicked with a grin.</p>
<p>“What was that?” JJ asked, a feint blush overtaking her cheek bones.</p>
<p>“Alex was propositioning me,” Emily smirked.</p>
<p>“What!?” JJ sputtered, struggling to keep from choking on her coffee.</p>
<p>“Ha! Your face! I’m kidding, we were just messing around. I would never make a move on my best friends girl,” Emily said placating the blonde with a pat on her shoulder.</p>
<p>“Or would I?” Emily asked mischievously. “I'm just kidding.”</p>
<p>Emily quickly moved around a stunned JJ and made her way out to the bullpen.</p>
<p>“She’s not my girl,” JJ muttered to herself before turning and following the troublesome brunette.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Morgan</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“JJ?” Morgan suggested.</p><p>“No, she’s definitely the smallest member of the team so that wouldn't work,” Spencer responded, his hand raking through his hair as he attempted to solve their dilemma.</p><p>“Emily?”</p><p>“Still not tall enough, I think with Emily we would come up a few inches short,” Spencer replied.</p><p>“Alex should work then, enough height but still light enough,” Morgan finally offered.</p><p>“Alex is doing what now,” the doctor in question asked as she moved past their shared desk.</p><p>“We were conducting an experiment of sort, a bottle rocket to be exact. And I may or may not have miscalculated the force and trajectory causing the outcome to be less than ideal,” Spencer nervously explained, twisting his hands as he did.</p><p>“And that involves me how?” Alex asked, wary at whatever half baked scheme the men were trying to involve her in this time.</p><p>“Look up Blake,” Morgan pointed above himself towards to the ceiling. Alex gazed upwards to see a small red and blue rocket stuck firmly into the ceiling.</p><p>“Ah, I see the problem. If Hotch catches you two there will be hell to pay,” Alex laughed at the guilty looks on both of their faces. “And what role do I play in all of this?”</p><p>“We need someone light and tall enough for me to lift, so that we can retrieve it before Hotch gets out of his meeting with Strauss,” Morgan explained. “Please Alex, we would owe you.”</p><p>“Owe me what exactly?” Alex asked with a mischievous smirk.</p><p>“Dinner for two?” Morgan offered with a sly smirk.</p><p>“I’m not going to dinner with you,” she bit back playfully.</p><p>“Oh no, not the two of us. I meant you and your blonde lady love.”</p><p>“I hate this team. Working with profilers who can’t mind their own business seems to be my lot in life,” Alex moaned with a sigh.</p><p>“How about dinner and we pretend we don’t notice the very obvious pining,” Spencer offered.</p><p>“Fine, lets just get this over with,” Alex reluctantly agreed.</p><p>Morgan stood under the ceiling rocket and motioned Alex toward him. When she was close enough he bent down and put his arms around her waist, lifting her upwards. Once high enough she managed to regain her balance before yanking the rocket from the hole it had created, swiftly throwing the toy back to a happy Spencer.</p><p>“Thanks Alex,” Spencer said, grinning as he checked the rocket for any damage.</p><p>“You can put me down now Morgan,” Alex said with a tap to the larger mans shoulder.</p><p>“Uh uh, I think I rather like having you here,” Morgan smugly replied.</p><p>“Morgan,” Alex said in warning. “Don’t.”</p><p>Before she could even complete her thought the darker man had thrown her over his shoulder and proceeded to jog around the bull pen before exiting the room all together, the child like behavior eliciting giggles from both agents as they made their way through the winding corridors.  </p><p>“Was that Morgan?” JJ asked Emily as the pair rushed past them.</p><p>“Yep,” Emily replied.</p><p>“And Alex?” JJ asked, disbelieving of what she had she had just witnessed.</p><p>“Most definitely,” Emily smirked.</p><p>“Ugh!” JJ growled before stomping away. Leaving an amused Emily in her wake.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Elle</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Professor Blake!” the loud exclamation of her former title jolted Alex out of the intense concentration she had on the files splayed out before her. Looking around the room she located the source of the disruption in a tall brunette stood next to Morgan by the entrance of the bull pen.</p><p>Alex squinted at the woman, running through names in her head before finally stopping at one that seemed to jostle some recognition in her. “Elle?”</p><p>“Oh <em>professor</em>, you do remembered me,” she replied, sauntering over with a confused Morgan trailing behind her.</p><p>“Wait, you two know each other?” Morgan asked pointing between the two women.</p><p>“Oh, we more than just know each other. Isn't that right <em>professor</em>?” Elle said, lowering her voice as she seductively perched herself on the exasperated doctors desk.</p><p>Seeing Morgan’s quirked brow and lecherous smile Alex attempted to explain. “It’s not what you’re thinking.” She leaned over and playfully slapped the mans arm.</p><p>“Not for lack of trying,” the former BAU member interjected.</p><p>“That’s true. Elle was my student and her efforts to seduce became quite the campus legend. Still is actually,” Alex explained with sigh that soon turned into a chuckle as the other woman slid herself further over the desk and into her personal space.</p><p>“How about we make that legend a bit more factual….<em>professor</em>.”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“Oh come on, there is just so much that you can still teach me.”</p><p>“No.”</p><p>“You could tutor me in private, just like the good old days,” Elle attempted again, moving to close the last of the distance separating them as she dropped into the older woman’s lap.</p><p>Alex let out a snort when she caught a glimpse of Morgan as Elle moved into her space. “I think we broke Morgan.” Elle twisted around bracing her arms atop Alex’s shoulder for balance as she attempted to get a good look at the muscular man.</p><p>The man stood stock still, his mouth slightly open and his eyes glazed as he watched the situation unfold before him. Shaking himself out of the daze when he noticed both of their attention on him. “No, nope. Not dealing with this,” he mumbled turning with the shake of a head as he went.</p><p>“So, now that I have you all to myself,” Else started, her grip on Alex tightening further. “You can tell me what’s up with you and JJ.”</p><p>“Who told you that?” Alex huffed attempting to pry the woman off of herself, a feat that proved to be more difficult than she had originally anticipated. “It was Emily wasn’t it?”</p><p>“Why professor, not even attempting to deny it. How scandalous!”</p><p>“I preferred you when you were just trying to sleep with me,” Alex sighed, giving up her attempts at removing the other agent from her person.</p><p>“Oh I would never deprive our favorite blonde of your attentions,” Elle tilted her head pretending to be deep in thought. “However, a threesome is definitely still on the table.”</p><p>The comment elicited a tired groan from Alex and a playful chuckle from Elle.</p><p>“Seriously! Seriously! What is wrong with this office?” JJ huffed as she entered the room with Emily.</p><p>“More like, what’s right with Alex. If you know what I mean,” Emily retorted. Watching as JJ turned on her heel storming in the opposite direction.</p><p>“Was it something I said?” Emily quietly puzzled to herself.  </p>
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